Hey there, it's so obvious that it has been quite sometime since I've updated this blog. To be honest, I chose not to update it because I was bored with blogger. Well, now I suddenly have the mojo to do some minor update.
So, as you can see it's already May. Wow how fast is that right? Soon enough, you'll realise it's already 2011 ! Anyway, I've actually been busy lately. You know, especially with my studies and everything else. We're actually having our exams now and for me it's like we're on war. Soldiers armed with armours and weapons and us students armed with knowledge and stationeries. I honestly have a lot in my mind a lot that I think is indirectly going on but since it's war time, I have no time on dealing with any of what I'm thinking. You know what? Most of the time, I feel like letting go you know, like stop caring and thinking a lot about them because of this caring and thinking I have and do of them, hurts me so deeply. I know clearly that I wasn't asked to do so, but I can't help it. I guess I'm that much of a friend huh? I really care about them that's why. Things have change a lot, a lot lot. I like things the way they were. No one's indirectly competing with each other to fit in the ' it group ' in this social life, no one faking most of themselves, no one dislike her and her and no one getting jealous over silly stuff. I want to be clear that I don't expect everthing to be as they were at all I just hope that things are better. Sometimes they are better and sometimes they're not. I'm tired of caring and again thinking but heck, I can't help it. I once tried to act as a stranger, someone who isn't me at all and I eventually ran out of pretty acts. From there, I learned a lesson there's nothing great, better and awesome to other than yourself. That's who I am now. I'm being myself lately from what I do to everything else it's all from my heart and from me, not from some foreign manual directing me on how to act.
Dear friends,
I'll always be there when you needed me so please don't say that " no one's ever there for me when I needed them ". I'll lend you my shoulder and my ears. I'll make time to listen and try to understad.I'll laugh with you and rock with you ( Omagahh I'm being so gay right now; well lemme finish ). I''l your friend, you can trust me. Honest to say I don't betray people trust.
Dear Arthur,
If only I would have the guts to tell you the truth. Tell you that I apprieciate what you gave me and everything and that I'm sorry but I no longer feel what I felt before. If only I have the guts to tell you that we were rushing and I wasn't ready for anything serious because I haven't really found the person yet. I'm only 16, I still want to have fun and so should you. You'll find a better person someday. I'm just not the right person for you. Sorry to confuse you. Look, it's easy to say it here. If only, only I have the guts to tell you. I'm such a coward.
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